Thursday, October 18, 2007

"Constructive" Criticism

I think I'm finally to a point in my life where I can say that I'm completely and totally fed up with the concept of "constructive criticism". What I mean is, folks trying to "better you" by noting all your flaws. People my entire life have spent hours of my time going over in minute details all the tings I don't do right. This is supposed to make me a better person, because I can focus on these things, right?

The more that I look back on it, the more I feel that what it's really doing is making the other person feel better about themself instead of helping me in the least. People who say they love you, and they care about you, should not casually wound you mentally. They claim it's "for your own good", but they wouldn't fathom actually physically harming you, so why is the psyche that much different?

I feel that for most of my life I've ended up focusing on the things that are "wrong" with myself, things I've done wrong, said wrong, thought wrong. Always wrong, always negative. I end up obsessing about it, and inflicting mental wounds onto myself and my love ones over it. I hide myself away from others over it, I don't want to open myself up for another "shot to the gut". It's self destructive, and I'm tired of it.

For those that think that pointing out someone elses flaws actually helps. It doesn't. It hurts. I think I'd rather have someone physically attack me than keep sniping at my psyche at this point.

Cause at least with a physical attack I don't start hitting myself later because you hit me first.

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